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Friday, January 27th, 2006
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Tha sun ablaze as Maria's foot
Touches tha surface of sand
On northern land
As human contraband
Some rico from Jalisco
Passed her name to tha boss
She stuffed ten to a truckbed
She clutches her cross
Here comes tha exhaust
And it rips through her lungs
She's off fast to tha pasture
Like cattle she'll cross
Degree 106
Sweat and vomit are thrown
And she prays and suffocates
Upon tha memories of home
Of Yanqui guns for blood debts on tha loans
Of smoldering fields rape rubble and bones
Of graves hidden trapped up in visions of war
Of nothing no one nobody no more
These are her mountains and skies and
She radiates
Through history's rivers of blood
She regenerates
And like tha sun disappears only to reappear
She's eternally here
Her time is near
Never conquered but here
To tear away at tha mask
And now she got a quota
Tha needle and thread crucifixion
Sold and shipped across tha new line
of Mason Dixon
Rippin' through denim
Tha point an inch from her vein
Tha foreman approach
His steps now pound in her brain
His presence it terrifies
And eclipses her days
No minutes to rest
No moment to pray
And with a whisper
He whips her
Her soul chained to his will
"My job is to kill if you forget to take your pill"
Her arms jerks
Tha sisters gather round her and scream
As if in a dream
Eyes on tha crimson stream
Numb as her wrists spit shots of blood to tha floor
I am nothing, no one, nobody, no more
These are her mountains and skies and
she radiates
And through history's rivers of blood
she regenerates
And like tha sun disappears only to reappear
Maria she's eternally here
Her time is near
Never conquered but here
To tear away at tha mask
To tear away at tha mask
To tear away at tha mask
No minutes to rest
No moment to pray
No minutes to rest
No moment to pray
No minutes to rest
It eclipses her day
Just a moment to pray
To tear away at tha mask
Away at tha mask
To tear away at tha mask
To tear away at tha mask
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Comments: Read 1 or Add Your Own.
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Saturday, December 17th, 2005
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Sunday, November 27th, 2005
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Monday, September 26th, 2005
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| Your Personality Is |
Idealist (NF)
You are a passionate, caring, and unique person.
You are good at expressing yourself and sharing your ideals.
You are the most compassionate of all types and connect with others easily.
Your heart tends to rule you. You can't make decisions without considering feelings.
You seek out other empathetic people to befriend.
Truth and authenticity matters in your friendships.
In love, you give everything you have to relationships. You fall in love easily.
At work, you crave personal expression and meaning in your career.
With others, you communicate well. You can spend all night talking with someone.
As far as your looks go, you've likely taken the time to develop your own personal style.
On weekends, you like to be with others. Charity work is also a favorite pastime of yours. |
Well...idealists never get what they want because nothing is ideal. Weak.
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Comments: Read 1 or Add Your Own.
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Sunday, September 4th, 2005
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| Subject: | Stoled! |
| Time: | 9:22 pm. |
| Music: | Die Apokalyptischen Reiter - Iron Fist. |
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| Your Brain's Pattern | 
You have a dreamy mind, full of fancy and fantasy.
You have the ability to stay forever entertained with your thoughts.
People may say you're hard to read, but that's because you're so internally focused.
But when you do share what you're thinking, people are impressed with your imagination. |
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Comments: Read 2 or Add Your Own.
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Sunday, August 14th, 2005
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My internet is being slow. Is it like a congested artery? Have I fed the line too much bullcrap? Probably...
Here is a little poem based on a dream.
Outside the sky is grey. (or gray, whatever you prefer)
The bombers bomb.
As I zig zag to survive
I wonder who I left behind.
Here is another poem based on another dream.
The struggle for creativity
Is fed by the teacher with lsd.
The creativity is appreciated by the creative.
The struggle to maintain composure
Is helped by a friend.
Was that even a poem? It's like that little debate in Ms. Smith's class...and my answer is "Who the hell cares?" Answering a question with another question is the only way to succesfully answer any question.
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Comments: Read 2 or Add Your Own.
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Thursday, August 11th, 2005
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I've decided to start writing nonsensical poems because it helps relieve some boredom. So here you go! I'm expecting rave reviews and also expecting to get my work published.
1 Fish
2 Fish
Red Fish
Blue Fish
I walked around the corner
And was granted a wish
By the magical genie
Who was eating an Oscar Meyer weenie.
The wish, thus granted, made me happy.
So happy that I started feeling crappy.
I went to the genie to get a refund,
But he refused so I chopped of his head with a machete.
Needless to say, til this day I still feel crappy.
So I started taking lots of drugs.
Take it from me kids, you should never make a wish
For it just leads to a wierd itch
On your lungs.
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Comments: Read 6 or Add Your Own.
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So I feel like posting lyrics that I like...
Like autumn leaves his sense fell from him
An empty glass of himself shattered somewhere within
His thoughts like a hundred moths
Trapped in a lampshade
Somewhere within
Their wings banging and burning
On through endless night
Forever awake he lies shaking and starving
Praying for someone to turn off the light
With this mic device
I spit nonfiction
Who got the power
This be my question
The mass of tha few in this torn nation?
The priest, the book, or the congregation?
The politricks who rob and hold down your zone?
Or those who give the thieves the key to their homes?
The pig who's free to murder one *Shucklak*
Or survivors who make a move and murder one back?
Shackle their minds when they're bent on the cross
When ignorance reigns, life is lost
Hungry people don't stay hungry for long
They get hope from fire and smoke as they reach for the dawn
Stroll through the shanties
And the cities remains
Same bodies buried hungry
But with different last names
These vultures rob everything
Leave nothing but chains
Pick a point on the globe
Yes the pictures the same
AIDS is killing the entire African nation
And a vaccine is still supposedly under preparation
But these governments they don't mind the procrastination
They say "We'll kill them off, take their land and go there for vaction
Weapons not food, not homes, not shoes
Not need, just feed the war cannibal animal
I walk thr corner to thr rubble that used to be a library
Line up to the mind cemetary now
What we don't know keeps thr contracts alive an movin'
They don't gotta burn the books they just remove 'em
While arms warehouses fill as quick as the cells
Rally round the family, pockets full of shells
Books all say different things
while people flap their yellow wings
trying to soar
by being a whore
of life and almost everything
the sheep that ran off from the herd
may be dead
but now's a bird
able to fly
able to die
able to break your cursed earth
Was it the riches, of the land,
Powers of bright darkness,
That lead the noble, to the East,
To fight the heathens
MAKING A DECISION OF DEATH,
WHILE EVERYONE AROUND YOU PLED,
NOW YOU FLY IN PEACE,
I HOPE, MY FRIEND,
A MAN CAN'T AVOID WHAT HE'S MEANT TO DO,
WHEN HE'S MEANT TO DO IT,
EVEN IF HE DOESN'T REALLY WANT TO,
MY MEMORIES ARE OF FUN AND FRIENDSHIP,
OF WEAKNESS WITHIN THE STRENGTH OF YOUTH,
FOR REASONS UNDEFINED, REASONS UNDEFINED,
REASONS UNDEFINED, REASONS UNDEFINED
A deer dance, invitation to peace,
War staring you in the face, dressed in black.
With a helmet, fierce,
Trained and appropriate for the malcontents,
For the disproportioned malcontents,
The little boy smiled, it'll all be well,
The little boy smiled it'll all be well
The unsettled mind is at times an ally,
Leaving the senses to fend for them selves,
The senses collect undeniable data,
About beta carotine and theta waves,
The unsettled mind is at times an ally,
Leaving the senses to fend for them selves,
Then, the senses wonder the sky
Modern globalization,
Coupled with condemnations,
Unnecessary death,
Matador corporations,
Puppeting your frustrations,
With the blinded flag,
Manufacturing consent,
Is the name of the game,
The bottom line is money,
Nobody gives a fuck.
4000 hungry children leave us per hour,
From starvation,
While billions are spent on bombs,
Creating death showers.
What is in us that turns a deaf ear to the cries of human suffering
Sheisse! That got long, fast. Well...I'll make a part two one day when I'm bored again..which shouldn't take too long.
If you read through all those lyrics, then I salute you!
And if you didn't, well at least you looked at my page for a second!
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Comments: Add Your Own.
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| Subject: | Bored |
| Time: | 12:29 am. |
| Mood: |  bored. | | Music: | House of the Rising Sun. |
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Since I'm bored, I will transcend into doing quizzes with no meaning.
Your Rising Sign is Libra |
A total charmer, it's hard for people to say no to you.
Irresistable and attractive, you have no shortage of love interests.
Totally competitive, you tend to thrive in stressful enviroments.
A peaceful soul, you avoid conflict at almost all costs.
Sometimes you try too hard to please those around you.
But you have a great inner strength that helps you bounce back easily. |
Now...I don't know about the first part, but the others seem pretty accurate.
Your Birthdate: October 19 |
Your birth on the 19th day of the month adds a tone of independence and extra energy to your life path.
But at the same time, it poses a number of obstacles to overcome before you are able to be as independent as you would like. The number 1 energy suggests more executive ability and leadership qualities than your path may have indicated.
A birthday on the 19th of any month gives greater will power and self-confidence, and very often a rather original approach. However, a somewhat self-centered approach to life that may be in conflict with some of the other influences in your life.
This 1 energy may diminish your ability and desire to handle details, preferring instead to paint with a broad brush.
You are sensitive, but your feeling stay somewhat repressed.
You have a compelling manner that can be dominating in many situations.
You do not tend to follow convention or take advice very well.
Consequently, you tend to learn through experience; sometimes hard experiences.
The 19/1 is a loner number and you may experience feelings of being alone even if you are married.
You may take on a tendency to be nervous and angry. |
The bolded part is what seems to pertain to me.
And for all you ladies out there...wink wink
The Keys to Your Heart
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You are attracted to those who are unbridled, untrammeled, and free. |
In love, you feel the most alive when your lover is creative and never lets you feel bored. |
You'd like to your lover to think you are stylish and alluring. |
You would be forced to break up with someone who was ruthless, cold-blooded, and sarcastic. |
Your ideal relationship is lasting. You want a relationship that looks to the future... one you can grow with. |
Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment. |
You think of marriage pessimistically. You don't think happy marriages exist anymore. |
In this moment, you think of love as commitment. Love only works when both people are totally devoted. |
Yes...that one was a joke...although I took the quiz seriously...pathetic!
Ok...I hope you enjoyed those quizzes. Take them because I know you are bored, too...or else you wouldn't be looking at my page.
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Comments: Add Your Own.
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Kevin Ray Gonzalez's Aliases
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Your movie star name: Munchies Ray
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Your fashion designer name is Kevin Stockholm
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Your socialite name is Kev Amsterdam
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Your fly girl / guy name is K Gon
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Your detective name is Monkey Sierra Vista
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Your barfly name is Chef Boyardee Water
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Your soap opera name is Ray Frazier
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Your rock star name is White Chocolate Light
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Your star wars name is Kevmag Gonsom
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Your punk rock band name is The Blah Fart
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Comments: Read 2 or Add Your Own.
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So I walk outside and greet the world, but it doesn't respond. What is wrong with the world??? Maybe it has a cold.
I have lost track of time...but I'd like to think that time has lost track of me. Why? Because it sounds cooler that way...duh.
Playing an instrument is cool. So I sit in a freezer everyday. I wonder if some being from another planet will pick up on the waves of my guitar and abduct me. Music is a form of communication? It is a language on its own? Guess so...
Tap your feet to the sound of destruction and you will soon notice the tempo rising.
It's time for you to get a watch. What time is it? That is the direction we move in.
My schedule has been reworked so that I wake up at 1 p.m. everyday.
I wonder if this entry will be cause for me to go to a mental institution? "Much madness" "Emily Dickinson...ha!"
I'm just random.
Yes, the structure's a cell
Mad is the story I tell
How long can we wait?
Shackle their minds when they're bent on the cross
When ignorance reigns, life is lost
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Comments: Read 2 or Add Your Own.
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Hey! I got a virus. On the computer that is. I've never gotten a virus before, and this is kind of an exception because it is not my computer, but I believe I have fixed it anyways. There may be 1 or 2 rogue files that are still infected though and I'll probably be back to square one by tomorrow.
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Comments: Read 6 or Add Your Own.
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So tomorrow is my presentation...I pretty much made up a speech a couple of hours ago. So far it seems that it clocks in around 7-8 minutes. It will probably shorten down by a minute seeing that I talk faster when I'm nervous. Pretty good for stuff that is just gonna come out of my head randomly. It seems kind of funny that everyone is all worried about the dress code. You're wearing the wrong shoes! You're going to fail! I'm pretty sure I got this down. And if not...then I'll run out of the room crying.
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Comments: Read 11 or Add Your Own.
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Boy...am I somewhat relieved. Somewhat.
Do you recall it's name
As it suggested beck and call
This face and heel
Will drag your halo through the mud
Ash of Pompeii
Erupting in a statues dust
Shrouded in veils
Because these handcuffs hurt to much
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Comments: Read 6 or Add Your Own.
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Saturday, April 30th, 2005
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Advanced Global Personality Test Results | Extraversion | |||||||||| | 33% | | Stability | |||||||||||| | 46% | | Orderliness | |||||| | 30% | | Empathy | |||||||||||||||||| | 76% | | Interdependence | |||||||||| | 36% | | Intellectual | |||||||||||||||||| | 76% | | Mystical | |||||||||||||||| | 63% | | Artistic | |||||||||||||||||| | 76% | | Religious | || | 10% | | Hedonism | |||||| | 23% | | Materialism | |||||||||||| | 50% | | Narcissism | |||||||||| | 36% | | Adventurousness | |||||||||| | 36% | | Work ethic | || | 10% | | Self absorbed | |||||||||| | 36% | | Conflict seeking | |||||||||||| | 43% | | Need to dominate | |||||| | 30% | | | Romantic | |||||||||||||||||| | 76% | | Avoidant | |||||||||||||||| | 63% | | Anti-authority | |||||||||||||||| | 70% | | Wealth | |||| | 16% | | Dependency | |||||||||||||||| | 63% | | Change averse | |||||||||||||||||||| | 90% | | Cautiousness | |||||||||||||||||||| | 90% | | Individuality | |||||||||| | 36% | | Sexuality | |||||||||||| | 43% | | Peter pan complex | |||||||||||||||||||| | 90% | | Physical security | |||||||||||||||||| | 76% | | Food indulgent | |||||||||||||||||||| | 83% | | Histrionic | |||||||||||||| | 56% | | Paranoia | |||||||||||||||| | 70% | | Vanity | |||||| | 23% | | Hypersensitivity | |||||||||| | 36% | | Female cliche | |||| | 16% | |
| Take Free Advanced Global Personality Testpersonality tests by similarminds.com
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Comments: Read 4 or Add Your Own.
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Tomorrow is like another school day for me. Yay.
I can never figure out how to write a lot in these things. I guess I don't have much to say. That or I just am terrible at writing. Probably a combination of both. Maybe it is due to the fact that my mind is pretty much blank. I think I should be thinking of something right now, but I am not. I'm probably forgetting a lot that I am supposed to remember.
At first, I was a little reluctant to being happy about graduating. I feel safe in high school...but now I want out. I need a new start. Somewhat of a new start, at least. Some people seem nice, but I can sense the bitterness.
'ello my name is Roger
Well hello my name is roger
I would like to proclaim myself
A god
And likely ordain myself
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Comments: Read 6 or Add Your Own.
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Wednesday, March 23rd, 2005
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Somehow I get the feeling that something is wrong. I'm not sure what it is. I just feel it. It's as if I can see the future, but nothing shows up. I used to feel sure of what was to come, but now as it gets closer I get less sure. So...I do the only thing I can do. It's not much, but it is enough to last until I come to the time where I can once again see what is ahead of me. A little uncertainty here and there never hurt. Although it does disturb me a bit. The foundation is a little shaky, but I can ride it out. I honestly don't know what I'm trying to get at. I'm just bored and typing. Whatever comes out, comes out. Train of thought.
I decided to put this break here because people like to see breaks in big bodies of text. I don't know why...I guess it makes it seem lke something less. My brain feels nonexistant at the moment. This is my subconscience speaking, which is why I'm probably not making any sense. And if I was, now I truly won't Bleep blurp boop beep moop shoop woop froop...I'm in a state of hesitation...but I don't know what I'm hesitating for. Oh well...I feel like sleeping. My brain is pretty indolent, as it took me 12 minutes to type all this out.
I am a man who walks alone
And when I’m walking a dark road
At night or strolling through the park
When the light begins to change
I sometimes feel a little strange
A little anxious when it’s dark
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Comments: Read 2 or Add Your Own.
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![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
fadastic's journal
anxious.
apathetic.
6.2
7.2
5.1
7.7
4.1
3.1
relaxed.
thoughtful.
lonely.
blah.
optimistic.
tired.
calm.
relieved.
scared.
worried.
restless.